A few years ago a new word popped up in our dictionaries, and today we hear it all the time; "proactive". It means causing something to happen rather than reacting after it happens. Think about it: pro, means "before"; and act, means "to do". There you have it; "do before". Proactive means more than merely taking the initiative. It means that you are responsible for your own life. Our behavior doesn't necessarily reflect our condition. In other words, just because I may drive a fine car, live in a fabulous home with a swimming pool, and every time you see me I am buying new furniture; it doesn't mean that I am wealthy with a lot of money. It may mean I have a lot of bills and don't know how I am going to pay them. Or, the opposite: just because you see me riding in a broken down jalopy, living in a small home which needs a lot of paint, and I wear the same old clothes every day; doesn't necessarily mean that I don't have money to do better. It just happens to be the choice I have made; the way that I live: I make the decisions, I don't allow others to make decisions for my life.
We have the ability to choose our responses in life. Our behavior is the product of our own choice. Most people are affected by their physical environment. It doesn't matter whether it is raining or sunshine, proactive people know how to look on the bright side and make it a productive day. Have you ever left your home with the rain pouring down and it's cold, and you think to yourself, "This is a wonderful day!" That's being proactive. You choose to feel that this is a wonderful day. On the other hand, you meet someone that same day and they are complaining about what a nasty day it is. They choose to be reactive. They are controlled by their feelings, their circumstances, their conditions, and their environment. But you don't have to let your actions be controlled by what goes on around you; by what someone says or doesn't say to you; or how someone treats you or doesn't treat you. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "No one can hurt you without your permission." If you allow someone to hurt you, then you made that choice. In other words, if you see the room is dark, turn the light on. Don't wait until you bump your toe on a chair in the dark and then blame someone for the darkness. You have the opportunity to turn the light on.
We are what we are today, because of the choices we made yesterday. Think about it! What choices did you make yesterday that put you in the place where you are today? We find that reactive people allow the actions of others to control them. Gandhi said, "No one can take away your self-respect unless you give it to them." We don't have to be controlled by how someone treats us. We can choose to be miserable or not be miserable. We can allow someone to affect us so much that we spread it to others in our life. We take stuff home from our jobs to our family; and take stuff to our jobs from home, making those around us as miserable as we choose to be ("misery likes company"). So, make the choice to be loving and kind. Make the choice to be proactive like Jesus. He will help you. "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." Ephesians 4:32.
